How to Confidently Communicate your message

Here's something I know for sure: if you were clearer, you would be more confident. If you were clearer, you'd be more courageous.

After coaching hundreds of women over the past decade, there's one thing that shows up as the gap nine times out of ten. And that's clarity.

Not strategy. Not systems. Not your website or your Instagram feed.

Clarity.

The Real Reason You're Not Confident

Look, when you're not confident in whatever it is you're doing in business, it usually comes down to two things:

1. Clarity – What exactly am I supposed to do? Where am I supposed to go? How do I achieve this thing?
2. Capability – When you don't have the skill yet.

Today we're talking about clarity because honestly? This is where most people get stuck.

What Clarity Actually Looks Like

Clarity comes from a deep understanding of three things:

• What you are here to do
• What the problem is
• Who you are serving

And I don't mean on a superficial demographics level. I mean really understanding your people.

This isn't a quick one-and-done fix. It takes time to sit with this stuff and articulate it in a way that you feel really connected to.

The Research That Changed Everything (My Recruitment Days)

Back when I was an IT recruiter – we're talking 15 years ago – one thing we always did was research. Always.

When we were looking for someone really hard to find, like a lead systems architect, I'd create what we called a “sourcing map.” I'd speak to other systems architects and ask:

• Where did you go to university?
• What other things have you studied?
• What magazines or online publications do you read?
• What are you struggling with right now?
• What are the challenges in your market?
• Are you in any meetup groups or associations?

We'd get the lay of the land for where other amazing systems architects might be. Once we understood that landscape, we'd advertise in their publications, get referrals, look at associations they might be part of.

We really got to understand their behavior, where they frequented, what they read, what they were interested in. Sometimes it was completely left field – they'd be interested in something that helped them be better at their job that I had no idea about until I spoke with them.

How I Built My Business Foundation

When I started my business, I applied the same principle. In my first couple of years, I interviewed over 100 women to really understand what was holding them back.

At the time, I was talking about “playing big” a lot. So I'd ask:

• What stops you from playing big?
• What does playing big even look like to you?

The answers were fascinating. Some people said playing big was showing up on an Instagram Live. Others were like, “When I'm playing big, I'm gonna be in a global business known by everybody in my industry.”

People had very different ideas of what it looked like to play big. What was holding them back? Some people, it was childhood stories. Others, it was challenges in their current business.

By asking the same set of questions to 100 women, I was able to understand deeply what my client's problems were, what their blocks were, what their desires were – all in their own language.

I've still got the massive Excel spreadsheet I used to understand the commonalities. The commonalities in language, the commonalities in challenges.

And you can only get clarity when you're really deep into your audience.

Where Most People Go Wrong

I was on a coaching call the other day and a couple of my clients were like, “I really struggle to get any of this information.”

Here's the thing – thinking about it as a one-and-done is not gonna get you there. It needs to be something you're constantly doing. Every week, every month, every time you're speaking to a client.

Really understanding what their challenges are and getting their words verbatim is gonna help you with your messaging. It's gonna help you put things out there that resonate with other people who also have that problem.

Where to Find Your People

You have to look around:

• Facebook groups
• TikTok (research the types of clients you're looking for)
• Networks you're already in
• Comments on other people's content in your industry

I remember years ago, somebody in my niche asked their community (who had millions of people), “What's your biggest block? What's your biggest problem right now?”

That feed and those comments were gold. I was able to see what all the problems were of my dream clients. I copied all of that and added it to my spreadsheet to have a deeper understanding of the problems people were dealing with and the language they were using.

The Payoff for Getting Clear

When you are clear – like super, super clear – on what you're talking about and who you're talking to because you've done the work:

1. Your message is gonna land
2. You're gonna be speaking directly to your dream client where they're like, “Oh my gosh, yes. You see me, you hear me. You totally get exactly who I am and what I want.”
3. They'll be all in

The payoff for clarity is huge:

• More consistent clients
• Speaking in a language they understand
• Creating messaging that actually lands
• Easier to build community and connect with your audience
• Easier to sell because your message isn't generic

Getting Clear on Your Current Clients

Here's something else that'll give you massive clarity – reverse engineer your client wins.

Actually look at the way you've taught somebody something, the way you've shared your knowledge and expertise. What worked well? What could be better?

Ask your current clients:

• What worked well in our process?
• What else did you need that we didn't provide?
• Was there anything you needed more information on?
• Was there anything that could have been clearer?

When you use your current clients to make sure the process is working the way you want it to, you've gotta go back and look at how you're working with them.

Right now, we're updating content in the Brand Accelerator and our education products. I'm speaking to current clients to understand: When you went through it, where did you fall down? Were there any gaps? What worked well, what didn't?

Really assessing what's working for your clients right now is so valuable. You'll be able to talk about not only the results your clients get, but be really specific about the different parts of your process.

The Numbers Don't Lie

The third thing that's gonna give you clarity and confidence is measuring and metrics. You don't wanna just feel for what's working – you wanna be able to say it.

Look at your content for the last six months:

• What got the most engagement?
• What got you the most follows?
• What worked really well?
• How do you double down on that?

If I asked you right now:

• How many clients did you get in the last six months?
• Where did they come from?
• What were the main sources of your leads?
• What converted them?

That information is gonna help you make better decisions with confidence because you've got clarity.

The Energy Shift That Changes Everything

Here's what I want you to understand – when you do all this foundational work, you're gonna become so confident in the way you talk about what you do that your energy is gonna be magnetic.

When I come across somebody who knows exactly what they're talking about, who's clear on their positioning in the market, clear on who they are to their clients, clear on the problem they're solving – with no fluff, no generic language, no general messaging – that's somebody who's building a brand that stands out.

The 70/30 Rule I Live By

Now, obviously we're gonna be testing and trying new things, so that clarity and confidence isn't always gonna be there. But you want it to be there for 60-70% of the work you're doing, then playing with that 30%.

I remember someone with a really big business saying that 70-80% of their business is just business as usual. It's what works, what's tried and tested, what they know converts. Then they take 20-30% and they play – new ads, new creative, new content.

They know 70-80% of their business is working exactly how they want it to, but they play with the rest so they can continue to be creative and discover new things that work even better.

Your Next Steps

If you want more confidence in your business, if you wanna be more courageous, here's what I want you to do:

Go deep on getting really clear on:

• Who your client is
• What problem you solve
• Who you are in that process (why YOU?)

That last one's a big one. I work with amazing expert women who are too scared to blow their own trumpet, too scared to say why they're amazing at what they do.

Sometimes we have to own our own capability, our own achievements, our own successes, so we can feel really confident communicating with our audience.

I've been in business for 10 years, made multiple seven figures, worked with thousands of clients. Own what that is for you.

I love working with somebody who knows their value, knows their expertise, and knows they can solve my problem. Because they've got clarity on all those things, they show up confidently, and it makes me want to buy.

Understand the equation and own it.

The more clarity you have, the more confidently you'll show up in all areas of your business. The better decisions you'll make and the better results you'll get.

When you're confident in all those things, you show up with completely different energy. Someone who's clear and confident about what they're doing, why they're doing it, and how they're doing it has magnetic energy.

Time to bridge that gap.